The story of Cindy.

Cindy has decided to lose some fat and tone her body, so she has decided get "hardcore" with her training and nutrition. But Cindy is running into one little problem: Her friends don't want to hang out with her much anymore.

Really.

Now that she's not drinking and not eating out several nights a week, her social life has slipped a little; she's just not getting that many invites to go out. And when she does go out with certain friends, they try to get her drunk or to eat foods that go against her diet plan.

What's up with that? After all, Cindy is smart, fun, and great to be around. Does she have to be chubby and intoxicated for some of her friends to like her?

No, what she's running into is a common problem. My theory is that we (fit people, people with willpower, people who've made positive changes, people with goals, etc.) make other people feel guilty about their own lifestyle choices.

After all, most people need to lose a little fat, and it's just no fun hanging out with someone who's doing it when they either can't or won't. It kinda makes their shortcomings and failures that much more obvious. You don't have to say a word. Your actions, your body, your results, speak volumes.

This can even evolve into full-fledged toxicity. But I know a few of Cindy's friends, and I like them. I don't think they're truly toxic. But then again, you never know how people are going to react to you getting into shape or doing something else positive with your life.

This is something successful, motivated people have to deal with: the jealousy and subconscious destructiveness of people who are close to them. Even family, best friends, and spouses can turn on you. . . all because you're improving something: your body, your career, your education, or your lifestyle. They've placed you in a box, and how dare you crawl out of it!

Two things are probably going to happen to Cindy if she continues with her new life:

1) She will influence her friends and they will join her.

2) She will lose these friends and make new ones who are also into this lifestyle.

Truthfully, a combination of both will occur.

Charles Poliquin and others have stated that you are a combination of the five people who most closely surround you. Their influence is enormous and not to be underestimated. Surround yourself with losers and you'll be a loser. Surround yourself with achievers and you too will achieve.

The solution is to live your own life, to do what you want to do. You may lose friends, but you'll get new ones. Better ones. This is fine. It's your life to shape and mold, not theirs. This is leadership. Your circle of friends can follow you or get out of the way. If they choose to get in your way, well, maybe they're not your friends after all.

There are better friends out there. Live your life as an achiever. You will attract the right people -- people who will accelerate your progress, not stand in the way of it.